superqueerartsyblog: a shortie about what I think should be...
a shortie about what I think should be improved when it comes to Pride festivals… visibility for everyone sure would be nice!
why i haven't reblogged that 'REAL lesbians react to lesbian porn' video yet (and why i never will)
[trigger warnings for all kinds of typical cissexist, sex-shamey lesbian bullshit]
- "who has nails that long?!" - lesbians with long nails do exist, and hey guess what, some lesbians don't like being fingered anyway so long nails are not really a problem (plus you can always use gloves with cotton balls in the fingers as protection from STI's plus safety from cuts/scrapes/etc.)
- "there is no lesbian that is that cruel to another lesbian", "*mocking* 'spit on my tits' i am not familiar with this practice", "holy fuck there's like 6 fingers in the vagina", "that's too many fingers", "they're calling her a bitch, that's not sexy at all", etc. - kink-shaming, general ignorance, and shaming people who like lots of penetration/possibly fisting
- "and the truth is most lesbians can't even take that kind of penetration 'cause gold star lesbians haven't even been with a guy so they don't even like penetration that much", "the ads are clearly targeted towards men, there's lots of dicks" - uh, hello cissexism and gender/genital essentialism
- "these are strippers! THESE ARE STRIPPERS!" - ugh ugh ugh
- "oh yeah that's so sexy. you're licking that sharp stiletto that's also walked all around town after you shoved it up your vagina to catch another STD." - STD-shaming and just grossly offensive all around
- and finally at the end of the video, they promote another video called 'what lesbians think about penises' which i don't even want to watch because y'all know it's gonna' be fucking cissexist and transphobic as shit
goodnight
lemme add some more to my own post
- yes, most lesbian porn is catered to men, specifically straight cis men who fetishize sexuality usually between feminine cis women with long hair
- yes, the video does prove that SOME lesbians (namely the ones in the video) do not enjoy this type of porn
- but not only does the video fail to recognize/inform that there is queer porn out there, and by extension, lesbian porn that isn't catered to the previously mentioned audience
- it implies that if you are a lesbian and don't agree with the video you're not a REAL lesbian
- there is no one way to be a lesbian or a queer person and that includes what kind of porn you watch and enjoy
- my criticisms were not meant to talk about who 'lesbian' porn is targeted to (because we. all. know. that. already) and rather to point out how fucked up it is that the lesbians that receive attention in media (ESPECIALLY in the youtube comedy community) have largely cissexist/transphobic/sex-shaming ideas
- and that is not okay and something that needs to be worked on
blacklightparties: physicsshiny: marfmellow: the-box-ticker: F...
Five Ways to Spot Somebody Suffering from Transphobia
reblogging because my anons are fucking up.
Never not reblogging
I hate when people are so focused on the genitals or even the chromosomes. Sorry but have you not heard of the fungi with 27 sexes or the fact that XX and XY aren't the only chromosomal determinants of genitals?
wilwheaton: drawagainsthumanity: And the Academy Award for...
And the Academy Award for getting so angry that you pop a boner goes to Lady Gaga.
This blog is a fucking GOLDMINE.
Hi. Trans woman here. This is transmisogyny. It's not funny. It's abusive. Sighh.
Add one more piece of evidence to my running hypothesis that It's only a matter of time before 'humor' targets transgender people.
Have you ever been so engrossed in something, you don't realize you're crying about it until you've stepped out of it and felt your wet cheeks?
Yeah, that. This entire week.
I sent my coming out letter home almost a week ago, and hadn't heard anything from my parents since...
I sent my coming out letter home almost a week ago, and hadn't heard anything from my parents since then. I was starting to get worried. I wanted to make sure they had received the letter and read it, not just thrown it away or ignored it. I thought about calling home, but I balked; memories of my last phone call with them about my transness still tasted bitter.
I took the easy way out and texted them a quick question, "Hey! Did you guys receive a letter in the mail from me?" I waited several hours with no reply. Maybe they decided to ignore my letter. Maybe they decided they weren't going to talk to me at all. Those were unsavory thoughts. I hoped my parents would respond differently this time.
I'd almost resigned myself to remaining unacknowledged when my phone buzzed with an incoming text. From mom: "Yes we did. I wanted to give you a well thought out response to it and have been praying God gives me the right words. The only ones He has given me so far is that I love you. So from Dad and me and I know God, too, we love you."
It's a start. I know it doesn't mean they're immediately on board with this, but at least they haven't shut the door on me. :)
dang thats deep
…
how do i win a girls heart
That's an interesting question, Anonymous.
I challenge the idea behind "winning" somebody's "heart". It feels like you're treating love like a video game, as if all you need to do is memorize a string of cheat codes to get "love". That's wrong. It's toxic. It's repugnant. It ignores the other party's agency in the relationship.
In my experience, a loving relationship can only form between people when all parties have consented to it, commit to it, and have a profound interest and attraction to the other part(ies). It involves mutual trust, respect, compassion, honesty, safety, and laughter. It's hard work sometimes. It hurts sometimes. And it's the best thing in my life that I've ever experienced, seconded only by coming to know myself.
There are no step by step guides that I've found to falling in love. Most of the time, it's a long process of trial and error, learning from experience, willingness to take risks, admitting mistakes and genuinely apologizing, and real forgiveness. Being yourself, allowing the other parties to be THEMSELVES, and quick to laugh at yourself are also very important parts of this.
But you could try your up up, down down, left right, left right, AB AB love konami code if you want. I doubt you'll get the results you're expecting.
I like the shirt your wearing in your profile pic. It looks super cute :)
Thank you! It's one of my favorites. :) Well, I have a lot of favorites.
If you identify as trans* feminine, trans* woman, or MTF, reblog this.
I just would love to see how many sisters are out there!
<3 Trans girls do it wellllllll.
I am a transgender woman and proud of it :D
This is Lucy, trans woman reporting in from the southeastern US. :)
LET'S GET TEES
LET'S GET TEES:As a fat woman, I have long been frustrated with the dearth of cute plus size women's t-shirts. The women's XL or XXL provided by most t-shirt companies is simply typically too small, while men's shirts don't fit the way I wish they would. As such, I'm looking to start a company that sells the shirts I have always wanted to buy.
The first step in this process is designing the base shirt upon which designs will be printed. Instead of picking willy-nilly from all the different examples of common women's sizes, I am asking women from across the internet to give me their measurements. I'll the take those measurements and develop several "sizes" in order to serve as many women as possible while keeping the shirts affordable.
That's where you come in! If you are a fat/curvy/plus-size/voluptuous/bodacious woman who has ever felt left out of the fun of t-shirts (or even just wants a new place to shop) I would greatly appreciate if you would take the time to complete this survey. I don't require any identifying information, and everything will certainly be kept confidential. All I ask is that you take your measurements and answer a few extra questions about your preferences.
But what about men and thinner women, you are probably asking! Believe me, I am loathe to leave anyone out. However, I want to make sure I don't bite off any more than I can chew. I feel like fat women are the most underserved when it comes to body types and tees, so that's where I've chosen to start. If this takes off I would love to expand into all sizes for all genders, but for now I'm taking baby steps. However, if you would like to support the cause, I urge you to fill out the survey anyways, just skipping the section where I ask for your measurements.
Thanks in advance for all your help, and I hope we can make this happen! If you have any questions feel free to email me at catiemonster at gmail dot com or tweet at me @titstummiestees.
exquisitedialectics: musaafer: sandandglass: I weep for...
I weep for humanity.
Just in case anyone was looking for a roundup of the most recent bigoted nonsense that people who should be taken seriously by no one who has an ounce of self-respect have been spewing.
"I'd waterboard him"- why do you look aroused Ann. You sick troll.
Is this what happens when extreme conservatives are placed in an echo chamber? It's like a little ball of hate-flubber in a closed container: it just keeps getting more and more energetic, ridiculous, and extreme the more it bounces. Sooner or later, something's gotta give, either the ball of hate-flubber, or its container…
Photo
Reblog if you want your followers to ask you anything they're curious about.
Just saw your pic on fyeahcutetranschicks - I love your top!
Thank you! :)
Oh my goodness, you are stunning. You're a truly beautiful person & I wish you the best of luck with your transition. <3
Thank you, GreyFace. :)
fuckyeahcutetranschicks: Hey, y'all! My name's Lucy. Today was...
Hey, y'all! My name's Lucy. Today was my day 1 of HRT! I'm so excited to start the next steps in transition. Thank you all for making this place a continuing source of support and inspiration. You're all wonderful! Drop by and say hi, sometime. :)
[Image is of a young woman with long blonde hair looking into the camera. She's wearing a grey top and can't stop smiling, even though the camera keeps taking pictures when she's not ready. Cheeky thing.]
Oh hey, it's me! :)
"You're Hurting Your Own Cause"
You: If you keep talking to people like that, you're just going to hurt your own cause.Me: Racism on it's own isn't enough of a cause to make you want to fight against it?
You: You need to be nice to people.
Me: Being anti-racist isn't enough?
You: You have to nicely explain to people...
Me: Why racism is a wrong? Really?
You: No, that's not what I said. You just have to be kind to people when they are mean to you.
Me: In your head, racism comes from oppressed people being mean to their oppressors?
You: No, that's not what I said. I'm just saying that you have to take the higher ground.
Me: What you are calling "Higher ground" is me being kind to my abuser in hopes that they will suddenly see me as a human and magically, just like in a the movies, realize the error of their ways.
You: Yes.
Me: Wow! I have to go and never be anywhere near you ever again. Thanks for the lesson in brutal ignorance. Next time, I'll just be outright mean so that I can weed out those that think "Nice" is the antiserum for oppression.
You: Whatever! You're the racist one.
Me: Oh look at that! You've hurt your own cause! You should have been nice to me. That would have made me see the light and magically think that your ignorance was really rainbows and lollipops!
Legalize Trinity!
Legalize Trinity!:So I've been neither physically or mentally able to work for a deal of time, and disability of course has denied me several times now, it's not the easiest system to get through. I'm also stuck in an area of Pennsylvania that isn't exactly the most queer friendly, and I have a history of being bullied violently. Having a traditionally masculine legal name has forced me to out myself in a lot of situations, and will make things like finding a job once my health returns very difficult.
I hate asking for money like this, but I'm at a point where it's become a necessity. I need this to start working my way out of this pit. If you are able to help me out or signal boost this, it'd mean a great deal to me.Please help Trinity with her name change. People contributed when I needed assistance paying for my name change, and this is a really important thing.
Dear Mom & Dad,
I feel like a letter from me is long overdue. I’ve been reading through emails and other messages we’ve shared in the past, and I'm struck by how I've changed and grown, and how our communication has changed as a result. I saw our exchanges grow tense, and strained. Part of that was just me growing up and getting busy with my own life and love. Lately, I think we've been doing a lot better with our exchanges. I look forward to your phone calls and texts and emails, and I relish sharing all the wonder and Wonderful in my life recently.
The past seven months, married to TK, have been a wild ride. Sharing our lives is better than I imagined. Through the crises, triumphs, and even mundane chores that married life brings, our commitment to each other continues to strengthen. Every day, I wake up floored to have found a partner who matches me so well. And every night, I fall asleep content and safe, cuddled up with my best friend next to me. Teak and I have grown together more closely than I thought possible. When I take a moment to reflect on how we got here, I find that you two, your relationship based on trust, honesty, love, compassion, and communication are a continuing, critical influence on us. Applying the things I've learned from watching you two is a very important part of how close TK and I have grown in our marriage. And I hope that applying those same principles beyond our marriage, to our friends and family, especially you, will allow TK and me to grow closer with you as a family.
Before I go on, I want to state clearly and unequivocally that what follows in this letter is not fiction. This is my truth, and I'm happy to share it with you in the spirit of love, honesty, trust, compassion, and communication. Now may be a good time to take a deep breath.
Mom, Dad, I am transgender. When we previously talked about this, I wasn’t very clear about what this meant for me or you. It has been a long, slow process of self-discovery. I'm ready to make things clear and move forward. To be specific, I’m a transgender woman. For the past several years, I’ve been living my day-to-day life as a woman in ALL respects except visiting family and going into work. I’ve been taking steps to transition into living full time as a woman, as myself. This means coming out to family, friends, and eventually at work.
I’ve chosen a name for myself: Lucy Grey. The people I’ve come out to use that name when talking with and about me. [Mother-in-law], [Father-in-law], Cadmus, and Calliope have all met me as Lucy, and are all wonderfully supportive. I’m sending a letter, similar to this one, to Artemis and her husband. TK and I regularly see a counselor, to help guide us through this transition, and I’m on hormone replacement therapy. I attend Mass with TK as Lucy at Immaculate Conception. Together, TK and I have a large group of loving, supportive friends, and we are actively growing that group.
To me, transitioning means taking steps to live my life without denying or hiding a crucial part of my identity. It means embracing a part of myself that took me a long time to discover and accept. It means finally looking into the mirror and recognizing myself looking back. It means taking steps to change my body, my hormones, and my presentation to that which affirms me and my identity. It means fewer headaches, less crippling gender dysphoria and depression, and no more hiding. It means more confidence, more happiness, more completeness, and being true to myself. Transitioning means I become a more complete person, a better wife, and a better family member, because I'm being honest with myself and my loved ones.
What does this mean for you? I think you'll have to answer the bulk of that question for yourselves. I can tell you a few things, though. This isn’t a phase, and this isn’t your fault. Mom, Dad, you raised me well; you didn’t do anything wrong. This isn't a cry for attention. This is my choice to live my truth, openly and without shame. This is me applying the life lessons that you both taught me: be honest with myself; don't be afraid to look at things differently; don't be afraid to try something new if something isn't working; embrace the pieces of myself and others that make us unique; love myself. It is me being genuine, and stepping out from behind a mask that never fit me well.
I've spent a long time making the decision to go forward with this. Without the tremendous amount of love and support from TK, [parents-in-law], Cadmus and Calliope, our counselor, and our friends, it would have taken me much longer to come to this point. It helps tremendously, knowing I have loving, supportive friends and family who will be there for me when I need it. Transgender people face some unique challenges in our lives, but I think you could say that about any demographic of people. I also know that transgender people who aren't able to follow their transition paths live even more troubled lives than those who are able to. That is to say, transgender people don't choose to be transgender. Rather, we can choose to be happy or miserable. I know who I am, and I've made the decision to pursue transition, to live joyously and honestly as a sister, a wife, and your daughter.
It has made me so happy to see our family and friends come together to support and love me for who I am, and it's important to me to bring you into that group. I love you. You're both an important part of my life, and I want to share it with you. This past weekend, with everybody laughing, smiling, and celebrating together, was a great reminder of how precious our family is. I don’t need or expect you to understand all of this right now. I hope that with time, effort, patience, prayer and lots of love, we can close that gap.
Now may be another good time to take a deep breath.
With more love than this page could ever hold,
~ Lucy
<META>Just a note, this letter won’t be sent out until some time in May, after Calliope’s graduation. I don’t want to take the focus away from her on her big day.</META>
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